April 28, 2005

Allergies & Sinus Problems - A Gross Industry

At work I just moved next to a poor fellow who sneezes and hacks up mucus more faithfully than Old Faithful. I'm just glad I didn't set a precedent of saying "bless you" after that first sneeze else I'd be hoarse and he'd be more self-conscious than he already is.

But what really bothers me is the constant drawn-out throat-clearing, a sort of elaborate Phlegm Relocation Program. And so yesterday I'm in the stall reading Dominus Iesus when lo and behold who enters the stall next door? Mr. Phlegmology. The lack of bathroom privacy makes me wonder if the call to nature for men is as synchronicitous as menstrual flows in women. I begin to think I can't escape this guy.

But then I'm thinking where is the milk of human kindness in me? Where is my compassion for this sufferer? Would antihistamines placed on his desk be too obvious?

Such is fallen man living in a fallen world in the 21st century.

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