August 25, 2006

419 Scammers

I just received one of those Nigerian scammer emails & it contained the typical line "with nobody to claim it". (Only the amount changes; this time there is $15,000,000.00. Funny how they always write it all out often with the cents showing. I suppose all those zeroes are meant to catch the eye.)

So I was trying to think of lyrics to a Nigerian scammer song, one with the refrain "with nobody there to claim it". The tune would be based on Barnicle Bill the Sailor since the oft-repeated line, "said Barnicle the Sailor", syllabically matches "with nobody there to claim it".

Who's that sending me an email?
Who's that sending me an email?
Who's that sending me an email?
said the fair young maiden!

"FROM THE DESK OF DR,CHARLES BOSIE",
A widowed queen with lots of money,
with nobody there to claim it!

"Pertains to wit, next of kin I seek
for the queen well she died this week
with nobody there to claim it!"

"$15,000,000.00, not a penny less,
please send phone and your address,
for nobody's there to claim it!"

"Yours for a mere processing fee
the queen was rich you plainly see
and nobody's there to claim it!"
Next week: On tap is "What Do You Do With an Email Scammer?" to the tune "What Do You Do With a Drunken Sailor?"

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