Ironic Catholic started it. Jeff Miller continued it. And now I'll have a go. It's irresistable really - you ask various and sundry figures why the chicken crossed the road:
Post-modernist: Chicken? Road? We cannot even know whether chickens or roads really exist.
Atheistic evolutionist: The chicken crossed the road for reasons arbitrary. The presence of food and water on the other side of the road was completely irrelevant.
Liberal utopian: The chicken crossed the road in order to protest the Bush Administration, lack of affordable health care and the fact that chickens have nerve-endings which can result in feelings of pain.
Ron Paul: The chicken crossed the road because he was irritating the neighborhood wolves and by crossing the road the wolves will leave him be now.
GWB: The chicken crossed the road to bring democracy and freedom to the world whether the world wanted it or not.
Independent voter: The chicken, lacking conviction, didn't actually cross the road but stood in the middle of it.
Bill Clinton: The chicken crossed the road after polling all options.
Hillary: The chicken, actually a hen, crossed the road in order to turn $1000 worth of cattle futures into $100,000.