To look at past sins and attempt to discover “what went wrong” in the sense of strategizing the whole thing (i.e. if I'd done X I could've saved myself and not really needed Christ's saving action) betray a self-reliance unbecoming. The secret is to look at past sins without surprise, for surprise betrays pride: “There but for the grace of God go I,” is a sentiment rather unfamiliar to those with pride.
Perhaps I will someday look back and bless these days for they taught me the thrilling lesson that I am dependent on God and that without God I can do nothing. Had I not sinned, to this day I would think God as the auxillary of, rather than capillary of, my life.
Update: striking Sancta Sanctis post that says this in a much deeper way such that I think I understand about a third of what she wrote... :-)