September 06, 2020

Ten Second Guide to Current News

Your 10-Second Guide to the News Today: 

1. Trump accused of disparaging fallen soldiers. (Who could possibly care what Trump thinks? Unless he’s your husband or father.)
2. Trump said Sarah Sanders should take one for the team. (Now that’s funny!) 
3. Tom Seaver died. (God rest his soul!) 
4. Pelosi faux pas. (Power begets power: she can do as she wills because she’s untouchable in her district, which is because she’s powerful.) 
5. NBC Sports POD (Pious and Overly Devotional) intro to “controversial” song “My Old Kentucky Home” (vomit-inducing) 
6. Report finds that 93% of the time protests are peaceful. (Report finds that 93% of the time I don’t commit arson or loot. Yay me!) 
7. Shelby Steele comments on the grifters and the white guilt industrial complex (Anyone know a way to profit from WGIC, maybe futures contract?) 
8. Pro Athletes striking on account of a stranger resisting arrest: (Monopolies have their privileges.) 
9. Looting breaks out in Minneapolis again. (Fire sale, literally.) 
10. Media puts thumb, arm, legs, head on the scale. (“You elected Donald Trump so that’s why you can’t have nice things, like fairness in journalism.”) 
11. Black MBA students get professor placed on leave due to their mental health issues. (Sharpening business acumen using WGIC.) 
12. BLM: (Black-led organization necessary to remind itself that black lives matter given level of black-on-black crime.)

1 comment:

Jim Curley said...

Lou Brock died too. He was my favorite growing up.

Jim