A public thanks to one William Luse. I like that he tries to keep my delusions of grandeur going (to steal his catchphrase), although they've been harder to maintain ever since I learned that The Mighty Barrister gets about ten times as many hits as I do. Blogging is a meritocracy. But then lessons in humility are meritorious, no? *grin*
Fr. Catoir in Enjoy the Lord: A Path to Contemplation writes that most of us grow up thinking we are especially talented individuals and then run against the untruth (and vanity) of this for the rest of our lives:
Most human beings have programmed themselves since childhood to become someone special. Consciously or unconsciously, they seem to seek their own glory. Their earliest fantasies involve the attainment of greatness...The first thing you have to learn if you are to pray well is to stop condemning yourself because you feel inconsistent, unworthy or guilty. In fact, you have to stop judging yourself at all.
By middle age most people feel that time is running out; that they haven't done anything of any great importance; that they are in fact declining in every way, particularly on the spiritual level. It is a common human experience, but remember that feelings are not facts. Expecting too much of yourself and everyone else is a form of vanity.