May 07, 2015

From the "Go Figure" File

I saw a truly mysterious thing the other day - a car with a Hillary in '16 bumper sticker.

This was truly "the other" made manifest! What could possibly motivate someone to bend over and place an ad on their car for such a dull, scandal-ridden politician?

Sure, I could see Clinton stickers on cars a year from now when she's the official Democrat candidate because then you have to wear your colors, like putting out a scarlet & gray flag when Ohio State plays.

But now? In the “idealistic” phase of the campaign when you can have a Bernie Sanders or an Elizabeth Warren (Native American name "Distant Sister")? When the world is your oyster and you can cheer for someone inspiring and fresh and new and truth-speaking?

Out of curiosity and a sense of wonder, I wanted to see who was driving the vehicle since there is nothing more surprising than someone announcing without provocation that they are voting-challenged. It's akin to a bumper sticker that says, "My Child Has a Room Temperature IQ". Perhaps I could divine some inner meaning from this craziness. But alas no luck.

Still, I'm sure there's a good reason. I propose several potentials:
  • He/she works for campaign. This would make the most sense by far. Campaign workers have to sign up relatively early and show/feign enthusiasm. This would assure me that the world isn't a completely illogical place. 
  • Is a liberal woman and feels strongly it is time for a woman president. The problem with this is if Elizabeth Warren ran (admittedly unlikely now) the sticker would presumably lose some of its appeal.
  • Is a fan of yoga and grandchildren and deleted emails. 
  • Is a wife whose husband cheated on her and thus the solidarity of a woman cheated. I'm not sure how much traction has since it's been many years since Hillary was the woman wronged.
  • Fame seems to be intrinsically charismatic and Hillary is famous. This explains the success of the Kardashians and why folks write love letters to famous serial killers in prison.
  • Maybe he/she supported Hillary in '08 and was very upset when although it was “her turn” someone else took her spot.
  • Maybe they look exactly like Hillary, right down to the earth-tone pant suits, and need the reassurance of someone running the country who looks like themselves. 
Perhaps some combination of the above, but still the fact of an early Hillary supporter is an amazingly fascinating cultural artifact.

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